leave it OR live it

A few nights ago, I received a private message from a friend, a beautiful, young woman. It is very rare for me to receive this kind of query at an unholy hour, which I understand. Matters of the heart usually give us those sleepless nights.


My reply to this and I quote:

“Cool off is u are still in the relationship but giving each other space and time”

“Buwag is the relationship ends na”  (buwag – broke up)

“Buwag is no more chance to heal it. Communication is closed na.”

And she replied:


Haha! Oo nga naman Shine …

This may be a common issue among young relationships but when you are in their shoes, sometimes you get confused too (like I did in the past lol).  It is a war between the emotion and the common sense, which when we are in cloud 9 we lost all senses.

We all go through this kind of relationship at some point in our lives. Lucky are those who have found “the one” earlier in their lives, and grew together in the relationship. Remember your grandparents’ love story?


I cannot relay her entire story but here’s my take.

  1. Space and time.  I am the “LEAVE ME ALONE” kind of person who doesn’t want to be bothered when hurt.  We all need space to think clearly and time to nurse our hurt ego. But it is important that you know where you stand. Baka wala ka na palang hinihintay o babalikan.
  1. Communicate. It is a choice if you want to fight for the relationship. Sorry to say this, but for me, once he cheated thrice (mabait pa ako ha), he is a certified cheater. It is an addiction that is hard to let go. Relationship is built on trust, respect and friendship and all three takes time to flourish.
  1. Love yourself a little more. This is not pride talking but your sense of self. You may lose everything for that love, but never let go of your self. Therefore, eat less sweets and shop for the healthier stuff.

This is Shine, your love guru for a day 🙂


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